Saturday, 14 June 2008

First Father's Day e-card I received

Some parenting experts say that "at some point not long after the baby is born, just about every new father gets hit with a sharp jolt of reality: he's a father--with new responsibilities, new pressures, new expectations to live up to. For some of them, this seemingly basic little epiphany comes early, before they leave the hospital. But for others, reality may not hit for a few days. Sooner or later, though, they all come to realize that their lives have changed forever. Sometimes the changes are subtle, sometimes not so subtle. But they're almost always surprising." (if you want to learn more this website is quite helpful. Click HERE)

I personally tend to disagree. As I expressed before in this blog (see HERE), I was lucky to share the 'pregnancy period' with my wife. I was not rushing to work then, I attended all hospital visits...became a househusband. Therefore the reality of becoming a father was not a shock.

I received an e-card from my brother (and sister-in-law) which live in NY. It was my first father's Day card!

While I was downloading it, my mind drifted away from the actual message. I experienced the virility, power, and pride at having created a new life. On the other, the feelings of helplessness when I can't satisfy (or sometimes even understand) my baby's needs.

My mind drifted on that first time that my baby fell asleep on my chest while I absentmindedly was stroking his back - here I discovered the true meaning of life.

My mind went to the lessons my child is teaching me already. One lesson I talked about it HERE. While watching my bro's e-card I was thinking how my baby is teaching me about planning and flexibility. Before I became a parent, getting ready to leave the house meant grabbing the car keys and call 'ready' and leave. But now, going on a trip with my wife and baby takes as much planning as an expedition to Mt. Everest. "Have we got an extra diaper just in case?" and will ask the same question two or three times just as I am walking out the door.

And finally I thought how different the subjects I talk about are now. I never imagined talking about leaky breasts, the color and consistency of the contents of the diaper. I smiled and cried when I thought about it. But I'm doing it. And I am loving it too.

Then back to reality and read the beautiful message my relatives from the Country of MR. Bush:

Dear Brother
Wishing you and your son the best ever.
May God shower you with his love and bestow on you health and peace.
With love always
From your brother Lino, Josephine, your nephew Matthew & Lisa


Marvic said...

Jiena u Ray nawgurawlek jum il-missier mill-isbah avolja dan ghalik diga gie ccelebrat fis-6 ta' Mejju!Prosit u thabbilx rasek jekk ma tkunx tista' tifhem lil Savio fil-pront - hija parti mill-process ta' kif wiehed ikun missier ta' veru bhalek! Awguri!!

Louisa said...


how beautiful! Your baby is really lucky to have a dad like you!!

Happy father's day!


Dillon said...

So very well expressed, Victor.

Savio will love this.

My Mum still has a 'diary' of us as kids.

Even as young as eight, Daniel gets a huge kick when he sees my making mention of 'the cub' in my work.

The unespected bonus of a 'living' diary is that what we imagine to be a permanent or static record of the 'photo-moment', actually changes with the passage of time and our altered perceptions.